The Handy-Man Can!

I’m absolutely tickled pink/proud of myself right now. Instead of taking a long nap after church this afternoon (my weekly ritual), I spent a few hours making a window plant shelf. I have a small gardening table on our porch and I plan to use it, but summers here are so hot that I knew I should grow my herbs and flowers inside. I can’t just set them on the windowsill, because that’s exactly where Mirabelle likes to sunbathe. You know. ON the plants. In fact, she likes this even more, probably because they’re soft and cushy. They don’t even last a day.

Back to my window-shelf. Did I mention that the whole project only cost $15?? And I did it ALL BY MYSELF!!! No Jesse. No internet. Not even help from the Lowe’s people, who were even WORSE at math than I am!! Our conversation went something like this:

Lowe’s guy: “How do you want these boards cut?”

Kelly: “It all depends. Are they exactly 1″ thick like it says on the tag?”

Lowe’s guy: “No, they’re 3/4″ thick.”

Kelly: “Alright, well, since my window is 30.75” wide, and I want 2 boards flanking either end of the shelves, I will need these other 2 cut to 29 1/4″ long.”

Lowe’s guy: <stares blankly> “Whaa?”

Kelly: <Tries to re-explain>

Lowe’s guy: “If your windows are 30 3/4″ wide, then that’s how wide we should cut the boards”.

Kelly: “I don’t think you understand! I can’t bolt these boards directly into my window, because the entire rim is made of metal. I am making a free-standing shelf.”

Lowe’s guy: “Okay, then we should cut the boards to exactly 30”

Kelly: <frustrated> “But there are two boards, meaning we have to deduct 3/4″ TWICE.”

Lowe’s guy #2: “What she means is this” (holds up the boards into a shelf for the visual learning application).

Lowe’s guy #1: “ohhh!! Haha, guess I’m really bad at math….”

Really. That was the problem?

Anyways, as you can see, I didn’t receive any help from those guys. I came up with the whole idea myself. I had mentioned my desire to make a plant shelf to Jesse a few weeks ago, but he was in the middle of some other stuff and didn’t have time to help me brainstorm the practical side of my dream. So, after dropping him off at work today, I swung by Lowe’s. I already had my measurements, I simply picked up the cheapest materials I could find and headed home to start!

Once I measured and marked and screwed everything in, I set the shelf into the window to see if it would fit. Perfect and snug. So snug, in fact, that I won’t need to bolt it into the windowsill like I had planned. Then, I took it outside, took out the hvlp spray guns and spray painted it white, so as to blend into the window better. It wasn’t an ideal day for painting– 45 degrees and windy, but hey, at least the snow from this morning had melted!!

So there you have it. I am now a handyman. I don’t think you realize what a big accomplishment this is for me– I can’t even hang a curtain rod straight!  I’m only good at putting stuff together when I have directions, and even then I’m pretty bad. The doors on my first TV stand in college were so crooked they didn’t even close. When I tell Jesse I’m going to do a project, what I really mean is, “In about 2 hours I’m either going to need you to rescue or re-do it”.

Next Step: As soon as the sun starts shining again, I am off to buy lots of herbs and flowers! Any suggestions? Basil the Giant Beanstalk, The Remix?

Fake flowers in vases for the picture

Close-up

All of my supplies

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