This article has been going around on Facebook, so I thought I might post it here and ask what you all think? Maybe the situation is spelled out a little dire and dramatic, but maybe that’s because I only have one kid? Will my perspective change once I have two?
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Becks says
“What do stay at home parents DO all day? I mean, I work 10 hour day and I do all the same things they do.”
Except for the part where the SAHM cares for a small child ALL DAY AND ALL NIGHT LONG, like that’s not work? I hate it when people think that since I don’t earn money at what I do, it’s not a job or a vocation, and that all I do all day is “relax and enjoy” while it sit around in my silken bathrobe eating chocolates and watching TV. And then my maid comes and cleans my house for me, and the nanny comes and takes care of the child, and my personal chef prepares dinner for my husband. Thank GOD I had this child so I could live this life of leisure! And of course, I clock out from all this hard work at 5pm (plus a few late parenting “events” which can go till 8 or 9!) have a quiet, uninterrupted evening with my spouse, and then I sleep a full night of refreshing, uninterrupted sleep.
It makes me mad because it devalues what I do. The letter writer isn’t even trying to understand what it’s like to put a small, helpless person’s needs before their own night and day. A small helpless person who can’t feed, dress, or entertain themselves, who poop their pants for 2-3 years, screams when they are sad or mad or bored, who can’t talk, or walk, or use a spoon until you teach them, and who keep their own wacky sleep schedule which include long stretches of day sleep and frequent waking at night. And that doesn’t even include the difficult aspect of parenting, like teaching not to hit, or bite, or throw tempertantrums, to be kind and good and to share.
I don’t think being a parent is “so” much harder than anyone other lot – I just think that it’s not something you do to be selfish and indulgent, and it’s a real job.
(Not mad at you Kelly! Standing up for you! I do get all up in arms when people don’t treat what we do like a real job though. Don’t cry, pregnant Kelly! 🙂
Kelly says
Oh, haha! No, I’m not at all offended. I wanted to know what real moms thought about this article. One mom at church pointed out to me yesterday that Gregory is a really “easy” baby, and I probably have a lot more free time than others. I kinda know that, somewhere in the back of my mind (although I have nothing personal to compare with G, so I have to take other moms’ word for it!), so I wanted to know about others and their responses!