My Kids Are Sometimes Potty-Mouths

Hey everyone! Today I’m also guest-posting at The Dwelling Tree! Check out her blog when you have the time– she’s a wonderful mom, rooting herself in her faith and all things important.


Some of you may remember Gregory’s struggles with pronunciation, back in his early days. Thankfully, he’s learned a thing or two.

But I still have AJ, who is as talkative as can be. From the moment I wake him up in the morning, he’s already chattering away.

And, just like Gregory, he’s also recently put two and two together– birthday = cake!

This past week was my father in law’s birthday. Gregory asked if he could call Poppa and wish him happy birthday, and the first words out of his mouth were, “Hi! Birthday! Cake! Icecream!” He’s also been going around the house talking about “cake” for days.

As the younger brother, AJ likes to get excited about whatever Gregory does. He, too, has been chanting, “CAKE!”

Only….it doesn’t sound like cake. He has the vowel all wrong. More like an “o”. So it comes out, ” C#&k”.

Yup. Loud and clear. Once again, it’d be hilarious, if it wasn’t my PRECIOUS BABY saying it.

But it got worse. As we all sat down for cake last Friday night, Gregory began asking me politely for a fork. When we didn’t bring it right away, he got impatient and started shouting, “FORK FOR CAKE! FORK FOR CAKE!”

And, as the younger brother, AJ started copying him.

But he can’t pronounce fork, either. He gets the vowel wrong, AND he leaves out the “r”.

Yup. He started shouting, “F#*k C#*k! F#*k C#*k! F#*k C#*k!”

A little part of me died inside. My baby, yelling obscenities across the dinner table. Thankfully, it was just family. And, of course, we were all laughing hysterically. Leave it to AJ to one-up his brother’s language foibles and “take the cake”, so to speak.

Other funny sayings as of late in our house:

Gregory: (whenever he wants to be held) “Can I carry you, Momma?”

Gregory: “Can I have a neck-a-trine?” (nectarine).

Gregory: “Momma! I go on adventure! Hey Momma, I back from adventure! I found all the stuff!”

Gregory: (whenever he makes a mistake), “Oh deary dear dear dear!”

Me: “Gregory, did you push AJ down?”
Gregory: “No, Momma, I BOUNCED him!”

Gregory: (whenever he finishes a meal) “Momma, I gobbled it all up in my tummy!”

Me: “Okay! Give me a hug goodnight!”
Gregory: “No, I’m sorry I can’t. I have to be big.”

Me: “Gregory, did you know you fell out of bed during the night?”
Gregory: “No, mama, I JUMPED out of my bed with a blankie!”

Jesse: “Gregory, are you chewing gum???”
Gregory: (gulps first) “No, it’s s-okay, Dadda, I swallowed it!”

Gregory: (after I told him I was going to work) “Okay, Momma, but you need to be CAREFUL in the world. Okay?”

Gregory sang to me, “you are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you’ll never know, MAMA! how much I love you! Please don’t take my Ma-ma away!” When I teared up (he’s never done that before!), he said, “Don’t cry, don’t be scared, Mama. You’re not an engine, you’re a BOY!”

Me: “Time to go to the store!”
Gregory: “Yeah! Momma, Dadda and Gregory at the store!”
Me: “Dadda has to work. Momma, Gregory, and Anthony!”
Gregory: “No. Leave Anthony with Grandma”

And, my favorite from this past week:

Jesse: “Gregory, where’s my kiss?”
Gregory: “Where’s my dragon?”
Jesse: “Touche, young one. Touche.”


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  • Christina

    Ah, you had me seriously laughing over here! I love toddler quotes! I should start writing down Ellie’s funny sayings, otherwise I will forget.

    • themrscone

      You should! I’d love to read them!